Onward, Christian soldiers

Worldwide Pablo received this news release today, hot off the presses of Village People News Service:

OPENLY EPISCOPAL MAN JOINS THE VILLAGE PEOPLE

Controversy Threatens to Tear Disco Band Asunder

MANHATTAN, Nov. 7, 2003 (VPNS) -- For the first time in their three decades of existence, the disco band The Village People have inducted an openly Episcopal man, igniting a controversy that threatens to tear the fabled group asunder.

Holding a press conference in New York City today, The Construction Worker, a prominent member of The Village People since its inception in the 1970's, urged "tolerance and understanding" for its latest member, The Episcopal Guy, who joined the group over the weekend.

"From the start, The Village People have been all about inclusiveness," The Construction Worker said. "And introducing The Episcopal Guy as our latest member is part of that tradition."

While The Indian Chief and The Fireman were reportedly in agreement with The Construction Worker about including The Episcopal Guy in the band, The Policeman, The Cowboy, and the Leather-clad Guy were reportedly opposed, creating speculation that The Village People might split up into two smaller, somewhat less influential disco bands.

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Note: Credit goes to satirist Andy Borowitz, who as near as WWP can figure, came up with delightful gem.

Comments

[Grumpy]

> While The Indian Chief and The Fireman were reportedly in agreement with ...

The VPNS needs to send its reporter back into the field. If I recall correctly, the Village People don't have a fireman. That's a sailor in the picture!

[Worldwide Pablo]

Indeed, that is WWP's memory too. That damned, libera1 VPNS news service can't get anything right!